mula aku mengenali seorang insan yg bernama "nurain bte sani" hati ku berdetik tok mendapatkan beliau...ku mula suka pd dia difacebook...ku smpai skg xpercaya dpt hdp dngn dia...ku rasa hidup ku ni sempurna ble bersama dia...ku just nk luahkan pe yg ku rasa ketika bersama dia...aku pnh memerhatikan dia ketika sekolah dulu dan dia agak sombong ketika tu...so ku rasa mcm xlayak bg dia sbb ku bdk kelas bawahan...ibarat bercinta sebelah tangan...then ku teruskan ngan hidupku sperti biasa...ku kwn dngan semua org termasuk sekolah lain...ku aktif dalam koku disekolah...ku mcm2 dpt sijil dari peringkat sek sampai ke peringkat kebangsaan...
ketika ku knal dia difacebook,ku buka wall dia dan ngok gmbar2 dia...ku rasa mcm nk tackle dia jer...sbb hati ku berkata ini lah pompuan yg sesuai ngan diriku...so ku amik keputusan tok dekatkan diri ngan dia...ku mula2 rasa tkot gak sbb tkot dah berpnye...ble dah thu blm berpunya,hati ku gembira gle...sbb ku ade change tok dapatkan dia...dlm hati ku berkata ketika itu,ble aku dah dpt dia,aku kan ubah segala perngai lma ku...buang segala perangai yg mse lampau...aku nk hdup ngan dia jer wlaupon mse tu xknl rapat lg just thu2 latar blkg jer...
pada suatu hari,hati ku rasa nk ajak dia kuar minum sbb nk jmpe kali pertama...ble dpt tahu dia sgn nk jmpe aku,hatiku hncur mse tu tp ku lawan tok kuatkan semgat ajak dia kuar...agak lama gak ku ajak dia smpai minta pertolongan dari kwn2 ku...akhirnya jmpe jgak di kdai mkn bkit beruang...mse tu hati ku gembira gle...xthu nk ckp mcm mana...gembira pnye pasal smpai mkn 2x...kat umah dah mkn then kat kedai mkn lg...huhuhuh...mse tu ku pndang je dia ble dia pndg kat tmpt lain...smbil tersenyum sorang2...nsb bek kwn2 ku xprasan...huhuhuh...ku nk sngt ade awek mcm dia...dr dlu ku idam2kan...akhirnya jmpe jgak...aku bersyukur sngt2 dpt hidup ngan dia...dia lah yg terakhir bg ku...
lps jmpe kat kdai mkn tu,ku kerap mgajak dia kuar...smpai kwn2 ku jeles...ku abaikan pe yg kwn2 ku ckp sbb ku nk jmpe ngan kuar bersama dia...ble ku kuar ngan dia,hati ku rasa heppy sngt3...xthu knapa...mybe dia lah jdoh ku...ku selalu ngok wayang ngan dia,pi karaoke ngan dia,jalan2 ngan dia,pi tepi pntai...ku xksh dia xmekup sbb muka dia dah berseri pd pndgan ku...ku xksh pasal fizikal dia sbb bg ku yg pnting adalah hati bkn fizikal...
kenangan paling yg ku xdpt lupakan adalah dia msak spegeti tok aku dan mkn bersama dia di pntai puteri sblum ku pi pulapol...ku rsa mmg bahagia sngt mlm tu sbb org yg ku syg masak kan tok aku dan mkn bersama...ku rasa romantik gle...mcm kat hotel wlaupon kat tepi pntai...kenangan yg lain ku ngan dia pi zoo melaka melawat binatang2...1hr suntuk ku kuar ngan dia...ku xrasa penat sbb disisi ku adalah insan yg ku syg selama nie...mse di zoo,ku rasa mcm suami isteri sbb dia manja ngan ku dan ku manja ngan dia...ku amik gmbar dia,ku usik2 dia,ku tkot2kan dia...mcm2 lah ku rasa mse tu...xpnh ku rasa mcm tu slama ku hidup...aku syukur sngt2...
akhir kata dan penutup luahan ku ini,ku nk bgtau yg ku btol2 syg pd insan yg bernama "nurain bte sani"...ku akan jaga dia sma sperti ku jge diri ku...ku nk jd insan yg dihargai oleh dia...dan ku hargai dia smpai ble2...ku sentiasa doakan hubungan ku ini ngan dia...aku harap jodoh ku ngan dia kekal smpai ble2...semoga tuhan memberkati hubungan ku ngan dia...amin...salam dr "abdul azim bin abu bakar"
hidup yg penuh kecerian bgku....
mY_dEStinY
mE_mYheArT♥
Me_9mEi
mE_MizHim
it's been a week since abg left me..aku btul2 rindukn abg..hanya ALLAH je yg tau cmne prasaan ku skunk nie..
YA ALLAH berila ku kekuatan tuk aku mengharungi smua nie...aku btul2 rindukn abg...aku xprnh rse cmni sblom nie..ku btul2 rindukn abg tiap2 ari..even ku xleh tdo kalo xde selendang yg abg bg b4 abg pergi ritu..b4 he left..he gave me the selendang..he told me to wear the selendang everytime when i miz him...and ku bkn juz pkai selendang tu..ku even tdo ngan selendang tu..ku btul2 rindukn die..npe ngan die ku jd cmni??? maybe he is the rite guy 4 me...ku btul2 xtau ape yg ku fikirkn skunk nie..npe life ku cm mendatar je..everything seems same je..xde prubahan lgsg...ape nk jd ngan ku nie??? smpai ble ku nk miz him like this?? skunk nie maybe die g 3bln je..cmne nnt ble die da kuar?? die kena lapor dri kt tmpt jauh2 lak?? cmne kalo die kena kj kt sbh swak?? kedah ke cm yg die nk sblom nie?? aku tau deep down dlm ati die, die mmg nk g kj jauh..nk cr duit lbeh..nk cr pengalaman..ku phm tu..ati laki xmcm ati pompuan juz nk duk kt safe zone je..ku terfikir kalo die kena kj jauh nnt lg r..xkn ku nk nggs ari2?? xkn ku nk cmni je trus2?? smpai ble?? mmg seksa merindui someone..tp ku leh bt ape je?? kalo die nk g jauh??
smlm ku borak2 ngan naz..cite psl abg..dorg mmg bezfren..even naz pon rindu gile kt abg..huhu rmai org yg sygkn abg..ku rse dri ku nie cm kck sgt nk bndingkn ngan dorg..dorg lg lame knal abg, lg lame syg abg kalo nk bndgkn ngan ku nie..kdg2 ku rse cm ku nie xlayak lgsg tuk abg..tp the wat he treat me..the love that he shown me..ku rse bhgia sgt..ble da bjauhan nie bru ku nmpk yg die mmg syg kt ku..
skunk nie ku kena kuat..even tiap kali abg called die xprnh putus2 pesan kt ku,"jga dri leklok,abg kt cni xlame,3bln je..ingt abg slalu"....ayt yg die xprnh jemu2 tuk bgtau ku tiap kali die called..3bln...what a long period tuk aku harungi sorg2...
even taun nie pon ku ttp xdpt nk smbut bday ku ngan org yg tsyg..even ku mmg xprnh pon smbut bday ngan org yg tsyg..dlu ms ngan pdaus pon..juz leh wish2 je cuz die jauh sgt..after him..da xde spe lg..it's been 3years ku smbut bday xde bf..tp taun nie pon ku ttp smbut bday sorg2 cuz abg xde kt cni..even bday abg pon ku xdpt nk smbut ngan die cuz die kt dlm tu..blm tntu lg leh dtg lwt...what a life.......
yOu_aND_i
mE_tODay
3rd may...
mE_LoVInGaBG
it's been a day after abg left me..and aku still menanti n menghitung hari bila abg akn blk..sound crazy but tu la aku..bila aku btul2 sayang n cintakn someone..aku akn sentiasa setia pada org tu..ari nie aku mulakan ari ku ngan rutin2 harian ku kalo x kj..smbil2 bt kj umah ku terfikir cmne la keadaan abg kt sna, da breakfast ke abg pg nie? abg mesti byk aktiviti kt sna..smlm ku kuar ngan akk n mak ku g jj..akk nk bli brg..at 1st kitorg singgah kt kdai crmin mata..aku lgsg xhiraukn pape pon smlm..ku sibuk msg ngan wani tntg prasaan ku lps abg pergi..tbe2 ku xsedar pon air mata ku mengalir kuar..ku sebak ble pk kn yg abg xde lg kt ku..smua yg ku bt aku mesti teringt kt abg..even nk kuar kt dpn umah pon ku sure terbygkn keta viva putih kt dpn umah ku..abg anta n amk ku blk kj, anta ku blk lps ku accident, aku terbyg2 abg tiap kali ku nmpk keta viva putih..dlm ati ku berdetik, "mne abg nk pergi tu?" ..ayt yg ku slalu bgtau kt abg ms kitorg gurau2..even ble ku tgk laki pkai bj putih ku ttp teringt kt abg..abg suke pkai bj putih..abg.........................
Me_LoVEhiM♥
KADANG2 ALLAH SEMBUNYIKN MATAHARI, ALLAH BERIKN PETIR DAN KILAT..KITE TERTNYE2 MNE PERGINYE MATAHARI..RUPE2NYE DISEBALIK PETIR DAN KILAT SEMBUNYINYE PELANGI YG CNTIK TUK KITE SMUA..
mE_aLOnE
tbe2 ku rse idop ku kosong..ku cm da xde spe2 lg slain family ku..ku rse cm empty..ape smua nie??
me_bROKenHearT
I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club. I found that I fell in love with him. Before that trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him. And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways. I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there were so many other girls. To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl… “Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?” I asked. He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him, I was just a girlfriend. The word ‘love’ only came out from my mouth. Since I knew him, I had never heard him say ‘I love you’ before. To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all. He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days…200days… Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don’t know why… Then one day… Me: Um, Jin, I … Jin: Here…take this… After a month, I got myself together and went to school. But what made the pain resurface was that… I saw him on a street… with another girl… He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me…as he touched the doll… I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell… Why did he gave these to me… Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls…In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around. Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him. He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house. I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that… it’s going to end. Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll. Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came? But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll. Then… Honk~ Honk~ Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days… when we were in love… “One…two… three…” That was how… I started to count the dolls… “I love you~, I love you~” I dropped the dolls,shocked. “I….lo..ve…you??” I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach. “I love you~ I love you~” It can’t be! I pressed all the dolls’ stomach as it piled on the side. “Jo…Do you know what today is? We’ve been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn’t say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that I love you… everyday… till I die… Jo… I love you…” The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now? He can’t be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute… For that… and for that reason… to me… it became courage… to live a beautiful life.
“I can’t”
“Why? You need to study at home?” I felt disappointment grabbing me.
“No… I am going to meet a friend…”
Jin: What…don’t drag, just say..
Me: I love you.
Jin: ……you….um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my ‘three words’ and handed me the doll. Then he disappeared, like he was running away. The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one. There were many…
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon the sky was dark… he still didn’t call. It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Still, I felt joy and I ran out happily.
Me: Jin…
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What’s this?
Jin: I didn’t give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I’m going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away like nothing had happen.Then I shouted… “Wait…”
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me…
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me
I put my pathetic self behind and clung on to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.
“I don’t want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else.”
That was what he said. Then he ran off. My legs felt numb… and I collapsed to the ground. He didn’t want to say it easily… How could he…. I felt that… Maybe he is not the right guy for me…
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying. He didn’t call me, although I was waiting. He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house. That’s how those dolls piled up in my room… everyday
I couldn’t help hating him, acting like nothing had happen and joking around. Soon, he held out the doll as usual…
Me: I don’t need it. Jin: What….why…
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don’t need this doll, I don’t need it anymore!! I don’t want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes very shaking.
“I’m sorry” He apologized in a tiny voice. He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll…
Me: You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
“Jin! Move! Move away!” I shouted… But he didn’t hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
“Jin, move!” HONK~!! “Boom!” That sound, so terrifying.
That’s how he went away from me. That’s how he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him… And after spending two months like a crazy person… I took out the dolls.
“Four hundred and eighty four… four hundred and eighty five…” It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms. I hugged it tightly, then suddenly…
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
Those words came out non-stop. I…love you… Why didn’t I realize that….That his heart was always by my side, protecting me. Why didn’t I realize that he love me this much… I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it’s stomach, that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much…
mE_tRAgeDiseMAlaM
semalam..byk perkara jadi pada ku..dari ptg lagi mmg cm ade petanda yg something bad going to happened..ptg smlm ku xdapat jmpe my bitter heart sbb beliau kena ikut family beliau blk kg..akhirnye ku kuar sorg2..g merayau2 kt jj..skunk kt jj pon da boring gile da..xde lg muke2 yg geng2 ku time2 zaman kegemilangan ku kt jj dlu..smua muke2 bru je..kalo dlu mne2 ku g pon smua knal ku..siap leh ajak ngulau same lg..skunk nie smua muke2 bru, pstu bt muka kerek je ngan ku, dorg xtau ku nie senior dorg kt jj tu..huhu da la jln sorg2 smlm..pstu mkn sorg2 je kt foodcourt..huhuhu trse cm nk nggs pon ade gak..ku mule terfikir cmne la ble abg da msk polis nnt? 3bln ku xdpt nk kuar dating same, xdpt nk mkn same, xdpt nk jog same, xdpt nk mnje ngan die lg...ku mule pk mcm2 smlm..cmne la nsb ku nnt..dpt ke ku bthn?? dpt ke ku tempuh smua tu nnt?? spe nk temanku mlm2 sementara tggu mak blk kj? spe nk lyn ku lg?? even ku xsuke lembu..tp nnt xde spe nk sakat ku lg..psni ku sndr je..even 3 bln..tp dlm 3bln tu mcm2 leh jd..aku da nekad..abg satu2nye tuk aku..ku xnk cr lain lg..maybe sblom2 nie ku slalu mainkn ati org..maybe sblom nie pon da ade yg ajak ku kawen..n even ade yg ku sndr stuju tp dlm ati ku xprnh rse cm skunk nie..ku xprnh rse yg he's the rite man 4 me...ms ngan najmi dlu mmg die nk serious n mmg ku pon lyn die serious tp deep inside..ku xrse die la orgnye..ngan firdaus pon same..even ku ngan die da plan da nk tunang tp smua tu sbb ku tgk abg2 ku sbuk nk tunang..maybe mood tu dtg sbb sj suke2 tgk org btunang, pdhal dlm ati ku nie..ku pk cmne la kalo ku tunang ngan die? cmne la kalo die nie jd laki ku?? trus trg ku xsggup..tp xtau la npe ku trime die at 1st place? smpai mak ayh ku mrh gile2 ngan ku sbb tgglkn firdaus dlu..tp ngan azim lain..ku trime die bkn sbb terpakse or sbb lynan die cmne njmi ngan firdaus dlu..azim btul2 berbeza..die lain..even die bkn jnis byk duit cm njmi yg slalu amk ati ku gna duit ngan pgkat die..or firdaus yg amk ati ku gna ilmu agama die..azim lain sgt...xmcm dorg...even ilmu agama die kurg..ekonomi pon xstabil lg..tp ku tertarik sbb dri die..keikhlasan die, cra die, perangai die..duit ngan ilmu leh cr..tp keserasian tu pntg...kalo duit myk pon...ilmu seluas lautan pon tp kalo xserasi xgna jg..ati ku btul2 pilu smlm..ku xprnh rse sdh sgt smlm..ku nk sgt nggs smlm..tp tuk ape?? sbb abg nk msk polis?? xmsk akal lgsg..die bkn nk tgglkn ku...die nk cr a better future tuk dri die sndr..ku sptutnye happy 4 him...bg die semangat..even deep down inside hati ku cm nk menjerit kuat2! ABG!!!! JGN PEGI!!! XYAH JE MSK POLIS TU!! huhuhu..tp ku xleh bt cmtu..ku kena kuat jg tuk die..ku kena relakn ati ku...AIN!! KUATKN ATI K!! everything will be ok! XDE PAPE AKN BERLAKU! aku kena redha ngan smua nie..ALLAh tgh nk uji kesabaran ku..ALLAH tgh nk uji ketahanan n sedalam mne SYG n CINTa ku pd die...YA ALLAH! AKU SYG DIA..JGN JAUHKN KAMI YA ALLAH!!
mEebaNDUngMuAR
hari ini dalam sejarah..my bitter heart ajak aku ronda-ronda bandar muar..sound so interesting, aku excited sangat nak g jalan-jalan nak tgk bandr muar..
♥meWithHer♥
hari nie dlm sejarah..setelah beberapa lame ku ngan bestfriend ku kt opis bgduh..kitorg pon bebaik2 blk pg td...Alhmdulillah..lega ku..ku bkn pe..die byk tolong ku ms ku ssh dlu..ms ku bru2 msk kj, time tu xde spe nk bkwn ngan ku..org2 opis tgk ku cm balachi je..tp akk tu ttp trime ku..bg ku tumpg solat umah die..ajak ku blk umah die tiap2 kali lunch hour..msk same2..ajar ku msk spageti..ajar ku cmne nk survive kt kem tu..die mmg byk tolong ku..even die la org yg byk ajar ku jd matang..die mmg kwn sejati..tp few months back kitorg selisih phm skit..bkn gduh tp juz same2 nk tunjuk ego..so same2 r xbtegur sapa...ku lak jnis yg mls nk amk pot...lantak la org nk bt ape pon kt ku..jnji die xkaco kj ku..die xsakitkn ku..xggu family n personal life ku..lain2 tu lntak r..ku mls nk lyn org nk bt pragai ngan ku nie..
Tahukah saudara semenjak Nabi Adam terkeluar dari syurga akibat tipu daya iblis, beliau menangis selama 300 tahun. Nabi Adam tidak mengangkat kepalanya ke langit kerana terlampau malu kepada Allah swt.
Beliau sujud di atas gunung selama seratus tahun. Kemudian menangis lagi sehingga air matanya mengalir di jurang Serantip. Dari air mata Nabi Adam itu Allah tumbuhkan pohon kayu manis dan pokok cengkih. Beberapa ekor burung telah meminum air mata beliau. Burung itu berkata, "Sedap sungguh air ini."
Nabi Adam terdengar kata-kata burung tersebut. Beliau menyangka burung itu sengaja mengejeknya kerana perbuatan derhakanya kepada Allah. Ini membuatkan Nabi Adam semakin hebat menangis. Akhirnya Allah telah menyampaikan wahyu yang bermaksud, "Hai Adam, sesungguhnya aku belum pernah menciptakan air minum yang lebih lazat dan hebat dari air mata taubatmu itu."
Apa Yang Akan Ditanya :-
Dalam sehari ada 24 jam. Dalam sejam manusia bernafas sebanyak 4320 kali.
Dalam setiap kali bernafas Allah akan tanya dua perkara semasa nafas keluar dan masuk. Pertanyaan itu ialah, "Apa perbuatan yang kita lakukan semasa nafas itu keluar dan masuk ?
Tiga Cahaya Di Hari Kiamat
Di hari kiamat ada tiga cahaya yang berlainan :
* Cahaya yang pertama seperti bintang-bintang.
* Cahaya yang kedua seperti cahaya bulan.
* Cahaya yang ketiga seperti cahaya matahari.
Apabila ditanya cahaya apakah ini ?. Lalu dijawab : "Cahaya yang pertama ialah cahaya wajah-wajah manusia yang ketika di dunia, mereka akan meninggalkan pekerjaan dan terus bersuci dan mengambil air sembahyang apabila terdengar azan.
Yang kedua ialah cahaya wajah mereka yang mengambil air sembahyang sebelum azan.
Cahaya yang ketiga ialah cahaya mereka seperti matahari. Mereka di dunia sudah bersiap sedia di dalam masjid sebelum azan lagi."
Kala Jengking Neraka
Di hari kiamat akan keluar seekor binatang dari neraka jahanam yang bernama "Huraisy" berasal dari anak kala jengking. Besarnya Huraisy ini dari timur hingga ke barat. Panjangnya pula seperti jarak langit dan bumi.
Malaikat Jibril bertanya : "Hai Huraisy! Engkau hendak ke mana dan siapa yang kau cari ?" Huraisy pun menjawab, "Aku mahu mencari lima orang. Pertama, orang yang meninggalkan sembahyang. Kedua, orang yang tidak mahu keluarkan zakat. Ketiga, orang yang derhaka kepada ibubapanya. Keempat, orang yang bercakap tentang dunia di dalam masjid. Kelima, orang yang suka minum arak."
meScaredOfCow!!
cOw..nate yg paling aku xsuke dlm planet nie..maybe kalo die kt planet lain maybe ku xmenci die cm skunk nie...
meAloneWithOutHim
he'll leave me eventually..
meMissHImaLready
ketaksempurnaan die adalah kesempurnaan bg aku..
mEhatehim!
aku benci gile ngan org yg xreti nk hormat privasi org lain..ptut ke die lyn ku cmtu skli?
mEinside
life is like a piece of paper..we the one who responsible on how it's going to be..either we decide to draw something creative or juz wrote something that meaningless..the main point is..we the one who decide what we want in our life..
mehurts
geramnya...kenapa la aku ni baik sgt? selalu je kena buli ngan org? npe la manusia nie lgsg xreti nk jga ati ku? ape la salah ku kt diorg? besar sgt ke salah ku kt diorg smpai diorg lyn ku cmni skli? ku btul2 xphm gile! kalo ku ikut ckp diorg, ku yg xhappy..tp ble ku xikut ckp diorg pon ku jg yg xhappy by the end..pe lg ku nk bt? pe yg korg nk kt ku?? ku pelik btul la kalo manusia jnis xreti nk bsyukur ngan ape yg diorg ade..korg cube la phm ku nie..npe asyik ku je nk phm kt korg? salah ke korg try lak phm ku? rugi ke? salah ke?? berdosa bsr ke kalo korg kurangkn skit ego korg tu juz tuk phm dri ku nie?? ku pon manusia gak..ade ati, ade prasaan..ade akal nk pk ape yg korg bt kt ku..ku bkn tunggul k..AKU MANUSIA MCM KORG GAK! tolong la phm ati ku nie..salah ke wei??
mesakitati..
most thing happened with a reason..but some happened without a reason..me, i'm juz an ordinary gul who always made a wrong choices..but those makes me a better person indeed..maybe those mistakes happened for some reason..people always change..i've changed..but i do hate changing..it always confuzz me about who i really am..